So, The Issue Now Is That Kanhaiya Peed?

Prem Panicker

We are now into day four of this story — and the outrage levels remain as amped up as when it first broke. Which makes me wonder: Just what is this story?

On a university campus late one evening, a student who couldn’t hold it in any more took a leak by the side of the road. Not a good thing to do, definitely. May he who has never answered the call of nature while thinking himself unobserved, et cetera…

A girl who was passing by objected. Again, perfectly valid, and good for her. (Equally good if it had been a guy passing by).

An altercation resulted. Again, inevitable (not acceptable, mind) — if I find myself in the wrong, a natural impulse is to lash out at whoever caught me out.

The girl complained — and so she should have; good for her. As Edmund Burke once famously said, the only thing necessary for public urination to triumph is for good people to say nothing.

The university investigated — as it is mandated to. And when the investigation deemed that the student was wrong, it took the necessary disciplinary action — and added a warning as codicil that any further misbehaviour would invite dire consequences. (From the fact that a year later the student is still on campus, one would presume he kept his dick zipped in public then on).

How on earth did this incident become a litmus of Kanhaiya Kumar’s fitness for the role of “revolutionary hero” — a role that, seemingly, no one but his colleagues on campus and a few media outlets looking for a shiny new object have thus far fitted him out for?

Seriously, people, we are hanging a debate on such ephemera now? Us? The country that 22 months ago voted into office new members of the 16th Lok Sabha — among whom an estimated, record-setting one-third face actual criminal charges?

186 MPs with criminal charges out of 541 surveyed.

Even more troubling, most of these charges are for what the association classifies as serious crimes, including murder, kidnapping and crimes against women. In the 2014 parliament, 112 members face such charges, including nine accused in murder cases and 17 in attempted murder cases.

Our political parties actually gave such people tickets to contest. What is more, the leaders of said national parties stumped for these people, and helped them win.

Oh well, at least none of those 186 MPs peed in public. At least, none that we know of.

Memo to the right wing: The more you throw fits of hysterics about Kanhaiya Kumar, the more you keep him in the very limelight you argue he is not fitted for. How hard is that to understand?

Memo to the media: You guys missed a viral bet: surely, given your recent proclivities, “Kanhaiya Leaks” was a headline begging to be used.

In passing, a contemporary news report:

A senior government official was caught on camera, urinating at the confluence of three rivers – Ganga, Yamina and Saraswati – popularly known as Triveni Sangam.

The video shows Allahabad Additional District Magistrate (ADM) O.P. Srivastava relieving himself, it has gone viral on the social media.

The irony of the entire episode is that Srivastava is seen wearing a ‘Clean Ganga’ t-shirt while committing this shameful act.

Apparently, the senior official was at the Triveni Sangam to discuss arrangements for the upcoming Triveni Mahotsav.




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